October 27 was my Alive Day, 54 years after death came alongside me, took several of my buddies but didn’t claim me.

It tried. It tried hard, even sending me floating above my corporeal self on the battlefield, having me meet with my mother, dead some nine years earlier, as she gave me directions to go back and live a good life.

Alive Day is not a formal event, not so much celebrated as experienced, mostly by wounded veterans, but also by anyone who has had a brush with infinity. While not formal, it is a very real thing, the date one might have died or been killed, but wasn’t. I write about it and spend this day in reflection as part of my own ongoing healing process, as my never-ending effort to be content when my actual transition occurs. I support veterans by submitting to Veterans’ Voices, donating to the Wounded Warrior Project and being a life member of Disabled American Veterans. I urge veterans to make special note of their own Alive Day.

Most, if they are like me, spent every day after their most important war—the one which happened to them—trying to forget what they saw, what they did. I learned after years of denial that it is healthier and more transformative, to remember. This is a very personal day, not one for speeches, for toasts, for “thank you for your service” comments. It is a day for self-thanks, for contemplation, a chance to listen to the whispers of gratitude and appreciation. This is a day to allow the memories to be heard and shared if the sharing might contribute to the good. This is how one heals and goes forward, in honor of fallen comrades, in appreciation for opportunities to be of service, living gratefully in the life one was given.

Some young corpsman risked his life and saved mine at Con Thien, Vietnam, at 0230 on Oct. 27, 1967. I wish I knew his name so I could thank him in person, but I have never forgotten him. He pulled me to safety and morphine until  the medevac chopper arrived to carry me off many hours later. I would so like him to know that I lived a good life, made a difference to many in need and aim to be a true and steadfast friend.